Saturday, 19 January 2019

Private Alfred Walton, of the Suffolk Regiment

The mortal remains of a soldier lie in a little graveyard in St Neots. The grave's white stone is slightly weathered, with traces of mould forming a green haze near its base. As a Commonwealth War Grave, it dominates the other graves in the graveyard.

The inscription reads:

30299 PRIVATE 
19TH JANUARY 1919 AGE 20

My family was doubly blessed: although we had family members serve in both world wars, as far as I am aware we lost no-one to that conflict. Therefore I find war graves somewhat poignant: we were lucky when so many were not.

But this is an unusual grave: not just because it is on a route I walk regularly, but because of the date of Private Walton's death. The First World War ended on the 11th November 1918, so he died a little over two months later, presumably whilst still in service.

So how did he die? Accident? The great Spanish flu?

Fortunately the Internet gives a few answers.

According to the website, his name was Alfred William Walton:

Alfred William enlisted in the 3rd Battalion of the Bedford Regiment in October 1915, and in May 1916 was transferred to the 2nd Garrison Battalion of the Suffolk Regiment (service number 30299) and served at Landguard in Felixstowe, but was taken ill with tuberculosis of the lungs and was discharged in August 1916 as no longer physically fit. It was also found that he had enlisted when only 17, when the minimum age for service was 19. He died from TB on 19th January 1919 and was buried on 23rd January in Eynesbury Old Cemetery.
He is commemorated on the Eynesbury War Memorial, but was not entitled to any medals as he never served abroad.
He must have been a brave young man, volunteering to fight in the war at a time when the horrors of that conflict were first becoming known, and whilst a couple of years younger than the minimum enlistment age. Like so many other young men, he must have lied about his age in order to fight.

Yet he never did get to fight, and tuberculosis laid him low.

So on this day, 100 years after his death, I remember and salute Private Alfred Walton, and indeed all the victims of that war.

Friday, 18 January 2019

Another coastal walker

Karen Penny is setting off on a 20,000 mile walk around the coastline of Britain and Ireland, including over twenty islands in that time. She set off from Swansea on Monday 14th January, and plans for the walk to take her four years, averaging 15 miles a day, every day. She is raising money for Alzheimer's Research UK.

For more information, see:
Sky News

I am slightly puzzled by the mileage; the coastline of the mainland can be well walked in 4,000-4,500 miles, and my own rather extended walk (e.g. by not take ferries) was 6,200 miles. Ireland should add about another 2,000 - 2,500 miles. Still, I daresay all will become clear, and I wish Karen the best of luck: walking for four years is an amazing aim in itself, and it's perfectly possible to walk 20,000 miles in that time.

Combining the coastlines of Britain and Ireland in one walk (obviously with a ferry or flight between them) is becoming increasingly common. I think the first person to do this feat was John Wesley, but more people are following in his footsteps. I'd quite like to do Ireland one day, but I probably won't get the chance to do it for many years.

One other note: my list of coastal walkers is very out of date. I hope to update it soon, and thanks to everyone who has sent me information on coastal walkers. There are lots of them about.

Thursday, 17 January 2019

Weighty topics

When I was young, I was scarcely concerned about my weight. As a teenager I felt I could eat whatever I liked without putting on weight, although my family might disagree with that! This was aided by the fact I was often in pain, and hence my appetite was stifled, and hindered by long periods of inactivity due to the pain.

But I don't think I was ever particularly overweight. I had my last operation in May 1998, I took up walking as a hobby immediately afterwards. 1,000 miles a year tended to keep me trim and, although I scarcely ever weighed myself, I got the impression that I could eat whatever I wanted, only to lose any weight gained during a walking trip.

Then came the coastwalk, a year and 6,200 miles of walking. Although I was already quite fit, my weight decreased markedly during the first three months, plateaued for six months, and finally increased for the last three months despite an increased average mileage. I can only assume that my body had got used to the exercise, so I required less calories per mile. Pictures of me from that time show a slightly gaunt, bronzed and well-weathered figure staring at the camera - I was certainly fitter than I had ever been before, and perhaps ever will be.

Perhaps the fittest I have ever been.
What went wrong?
As I passed through my thirties, work and other obligations weighed on me and my weight slowly increased. I got married, and happiness induced a certain sloth that also helped my paunch grow. Then, a small back problem and the birth of our son led to me reaching 100kg.

This is overweight, but I have short legs and a long body, and I kept on telling myself it didn't really matter.

Then, on February 1st 2016, I got meningitis.

The meningitis was not caused by my weight, nor by my general health. It just happened. But I was shocked when I went on scales in the hospital and discovered I weighed over 105kg. I had to face it: I was in my mid-forties, overweight, and with a young son who I wanted to see grow up into adulthood. The meningitis had been an almighty scare, and my mortality had been made clear to me.

I decided to do something about it.

I started in September 2016. A two-pronged approach of boring calorie counting and even more boring running led me to a weight of 95kg, which I was more happy with. I also cut down on my drinking, which I was less happy with. Since then, more of the same has led me down to about 90-92kg. This means my BMI says I am still overweight, despite there not being much more to loose.

I find I can maintain 90-92kg fairly easily, without undergoing too much suffering and without doing too much exercise. Best of all, it's not trying mentally: I don't find it hard to do. Attempts to go below 90kg always fail within a few weeks.

My ideal weight in my mid-forties seems to be about 90kg. I wonder what it will be in my fifties or sixties?

Wednesday, 16 January 2019


It's all a bit of a mess, isn't it?

There is no clear way forward now that May's deal has been rejected. Many anti-deal people want options that involve the agreement of third parties, and therefore might be unavailable. They are wishing on unicorns.

The public split 52-48 on the Brexit referendum, and polling shows very little change in their view since then. Some polls show remain in the lead, some show leave. The country is still bitterly divided.

I have no answers. It is up to reasonable people in parliament to be sane and sensible, and they are proving to be unreasonable, far from sane and very, very silly.

In my view, the first question MPs and the wider public should ask is: "what is certainly deliverable?" The second question they should ask is: "what will the great British public support?"

I cannot see an answer that satisfies both these questions. Brexit has split the country, and it seems few people - especially MPs - are willing to compromise their views, even when those views are undeliverable or anathema to the public.

It is easy to think of options that suit individuals.

You might want a second referendum. But which options would be 'fair'? There is also precious little time for one to be held before the end of March.

You might want an extension to A50 beyond March 29th to allow more time to sort it out, but the EU might not want an extension beyond the next European elections - and besides, who says people will change their minds even if we give them an eternity?

You may want to cancel Brexit, but would the EU want us to remain in with the same conditions, rebates etc as before, or will we be forced deeper into their project? And if the result of the 2016 referendum is ignored, people might reasonably cry: "what price democracy?"

The only clearly deliverable option is no-deal Brexit, and that threatens to be disastrous to the economy and country: but that is only deliverable because nothing needs to be done for it to be delivered. It is the default.

So that is where we are heading: a no-deal, crash-out Brexit that will harm the country in many ways.

I hope I am wrong.

Politics is moving very fast at the moment, with May facing a vote of no confidence this evening. Sadly, it seems that the views of too many people are firmly entrenched.

Tuesday, 15 January 2019

Concrete barges

Whilst walking the final stretch of the London Loop path near Coldharbour Point, I came across 16 concrete boats wallowing in the mud. Some had their bows pointing towards shore, as if trying to clamber onto dry land, whilst others lay marooned at random angles. Lengths of rusty reinforcing bar showed through gaps where the concrete had decayed.

When I got home, I decided to research them. These boats were built in the early 1940s to cope with the increased wartime need for vessels. They are technically called ferro-cement barges - the advantage of concrete being that less steel was required in their construction, at a time when steel was scarce. The barges were also not expected to last long, whereas a ship might be designed to serve for decades. Each weighs about 200 tons, and were constructed at the London Docks before being craned into the water. These particular ones were built for handling and transporting petrol.

It is rumoured that barges of this sort were used in the D-Day landings and Mulberry Harbours, perhaps as parts of the floating roadway. Whether these particular vessels were used or not, they were dumped on the riverside after the 1953 floods to act as coastal protection, and have lain there ever since.

Or have they? They seem in a slightly odd arrangement and location for that to be the case, at least to my inexpert eyes. Were they used, and then moved to be dumped at their current location once the defences had been repaired?

They appear to be in surprisingly good condition given they were built around 75 years ago, and have been abandoned for over 65. Whereas wooden vessels soon disintegrate except where they are buried in sand, and metal rusts to nothing, some of these concrete boats appear as though they could be refloated and used - although that is almost certainly a false appearance.

The website has details on how similar vessels were made (although I believe not these particular ones) - including an interview with the designer! It's interesting to see Gunite was used - an early version of the shotcrete used in civil engineering nowadays.

At times the Second World War can seem rather distant. It is therefore good to see some concrete reminders of the war - even if it is in a rather bleak, industrial and wind-blown spot on the Thames Estuary.

Monday, 14 January 2019

Driver aids

I have long been bearish on autonomous cars. This has not been helped by Elon Musk and Tesla consistently over-selling the autonomous capabilities of their cars, and of journalists sometimes  overawed reviews of other companies technology, e.g. Waymo.

The wheels have somewhat come off the autonomous car juggernaut over the last year (and I will try to write about this later). But for this post, I thought I would look at the other end of the problem: simple driver assistance aids.

Sencan recently got a new job with a longer commute, and we decided to get a new car. And for the first time in our lives, it would be a brand-new car.

After rejecting the new-style Honda Jazz, and covetously eyeing a Ford Fiesta, she decided upon a Hyundai I20. The model we chose has several driver aids: Lane Keeping Assist System, Lane Departure Warning System, Forward Collision Avoidance, and Driver Attention Alert.

Sencan has been driving it to and from work for the last few months, and I only recently got to drive it for a journey further than the local shops.

I have never driven a car with these aids before, so I thought I'd have a quick trial of them (excluding Forward Collision Avoidance, which would be rather difficult to test safely) to see what I thought.

Lane Keeping Assist System

This is where the car detects a lane ahead, and if you drift out of the lane, it pulls the car back in. Whilst active, a light illuminates on the dashboard and the feeling feels heavier: similar to an old, heavy vehicle without power steering. The car definitely lets you know it is in control.

Somewhat surprisingly, it also steered around bends (this is probably not recommended usage of it) if I just rested my hands on the wheel.

When enabled, lane keeping assist appears to work well. The steering is heavy enough to allow you to know that it is enabled without seeing the dashboard light, and it seems to follow the lane well - although on some bends it steers like a fifty-pence piece - perhaps because its cameras can only 'see' a short distance ahead.

However, it does not seem to trigger on country roads or in towns, and even on an A road, it occasionally flickers on and off.

Lane Departure Warning System

In this, a light flashes and a buzzer sounds if you go outside a lane - at least on the driver's side;  I had no safe opportunity to test it on the nearside.

Driver Attention Alert

I tried resting my hands loosely on the wheel to see how well it would keep to the lane (as safely as possible; I never actually let go), and a warning would flash up to tell me to keep my hands on the wheel. This also seemed fairly reliable and unremarkable.

General notes

In the case of lane assist, it seems to require white lines on both sides delineating the lane, and will only activate if both are there. If so, this makes sense, as such line detection is far easier than trying to detect the actual edge of the road if the lines are not present. However the flickering on and off of lane assist can be annoying; I presume it is trying to fail safe (i.e. off).

The lane warning is much more robust; if I go over a white line it beeps and a light flashes on the dashboard. This seems much more aggressive in its detection than the lane assist; perhaps because it is only a warning, a few false positives (i.e. warnings given when one is not required) does not matter.


All in all, it was a positive experience. It is an interesting first step towards automation, albeit a baby step. There is also a massive gulf between it and true autonomy, especially in the places lane assist would not enable itself, despite the lanes being obvious. In my opinion they can also be a valuable driving aid - if used correctly.

For me, the most impressive thing is that this capability is present in a reasonably-priced car, and appears to work well and unobtrusively. But there is a vast gulf between such assistant technologies and the ones required for automated driving, which will have to work 100% of the time.

Sunday, 13 January 2019

John Bellingham

Political assassinations are thankfully uncommon here in the UK. Aside from the tragic murder of Labour MP Jo Cox in 2016, there have been precious few attacks on our MPs.

Before Jo Cox's tragic death, the IRA and their predecessors had done their best to kill MPs, succeeding on six occasions. Despite the list of sitting MPs who have been murdered is thankfully low.

But these are just the successful attempts; there have been other, unsuccessful ones. Labour MP Stephen Timms was attacked by an Islamic extremist, whilst a tragic machete attack on Nigel Jones killed his researcher, Andrew Pennington. It is clear that MPs can make an attractive target.

A simple plaque on a building in St Neots tells the story of John Bellingham, the only person to successfully murder a sitting Prime Minister.

An event to have civic pride in?

By all accounts (mostly, it should be said, written after his crime), Bellingham was not a success in  life. Born in St Neots in 1776, he set himself up in business and travelled the world, including to Russia, where he ended up in jail in 1804 over bad debts. It took him five years to finally make it home, and he seems to have spent that time getting increasingly annoyed.

For some reason, he believed the British government owed him compensation for his imprisonment in Russia. After his pleas to the government failed, he travelled on the 11th May 1812 to the Houses of Parliament, where he waited in a lobby. As Prime Minister Spencer Perceval (apparently not 'Percival' as on the plaque) appeared at about 5.15 in the afternoon, Bellingham shot him in the chest.

Bellingham made no attempt to escape, and in fact sat down on a bench. He therefore cannot have been very surprised when he was swiftly arrested, tried and executed within a week - despite people attempting to help him escape!

There was a surprising amount of public sympathy for him, partly due to Spencer Perceval's unpopularity, and a subscription ensured that the success he had missed in life was partly gained in death.

As for Perceval? He is a forgotten Prime Minister. Few remember him, and when they do, it is for the nature of his death that any of his many achievements in life.

Saturday, 12 January 2019


I have a love-hate relationship with Elon Musk. I love much of what he is trying to do, and his grand aims. I hate much of the way he goes about it, and in particular how he communicates. These latter feelings are not helped by the Musk fanbois online.

But he aims high, and when he delivers, he can really deliver. His company SpaceX have already revolutionised transport into space with their semi-reusable rocket system, Falcon 9. Not willing to rest on his laurels, for the last three years he has been heavily trailing a new fully-reusable rocket/spacecraft duo designed, so he claims, to take up to 100 people to Mars.

Yes, that is two Mars-related posts in a row.

The system has changed over the years, with the system downscaling to 9 meters diameter (probably from 12 metres) and, most recently, from carbon-fibre to stainless steel - a change that is probably worth a post of its own. It has also changed names several times, from ITS (Interplanetary Transport System), to BFR (Big F***ing Rocket), and now to the (IMO lame) 'Starship'. The initial launch site was announced as being a new site they were developing at Boca Chica in Texas, just a few miles from the Mexico border.

In December, keen-eyed observers noticed some unusual activity at Boca Chica. Engineers (allegedly agricultural ones) were building some tank-like structure that many thought might be a water tower.

Obviously a water tank

Spacecraft are built inside buildings by highly-skilled aerospace engineers. They are not built outside, exposed to the elements - and certainly not by agricultural engineers. There's no way this could be a spacecraft ...


As the structure grew and more parts became visible, it soon became clear that a real vehicle was being built. Later on, Musk announced this is actually a development version of the new BFR (I refuse to call it 'Starship') spacecraft that will be used to test systems. It is not the first time they have done this: a few years ago they developed a testbed for Falcon 9 landings called Grasshopper, as shown below. This new rocket will be performing a similar role for the Falcon 9's much larger sibling, and has already been named 'Starhopper' by fans.

And now, in what is an incredibly fast time, assembly has finished on the test BFR. And it is ... remarkable.

This is not a render.

I think this looks truly stupendous. And for scale, that is a human standing underneath it. Yet at about 30-40 metres, this behemoth is shorter than the 55-metre actual rocket, and has three rather than seven engines. And this is only the second stage: the first stage booster that will loft this high up into the atmosphere before returning to land will be much larger (63 metres high with 31 engines).

I wish SpaceX all the best with this. If function follows form, then this will do well. I can't wait to see it do its first hop in a few months time.

Friday, 11 January 2019

Book review: Mars, by Ben Bova.

The Red Planet is hotter than ever. With Andy Weir's excellent 'The Martian' being a hit in both book and film forms, NASA's landers and rovers toiling on the surface, and Elon Musk's SpaceX working towards a rocket that may enable Mars colonisation, Earth's neighbour is getting a great deal of deserved attention.

Mars has featured in literature many times over the years. An example of this is Ben Bova's 1992 book 'Mars', about an international mission to Mars. The book is part of his 'Grand Tour' series around the planets.

I have mixed feelings about this book. The book's protagonist, Jamie Waterman, is a Navajo geologist on the ground team. His character felt particularly weak, and the plotline revolving around his ancestry was poorly developed and perhaps even stereotyped. Likewise, many of his compatriots are poorly written in my view - Anthony Reid, the doctor, is a snivelling Englishman with severe daddy issues.

To make things worse, the characters all act unprofessionally - behaving more like bunnies on Viagra than serious scientists in a dangerous environment, and letting international rivalries get in the way of their mission.

All of this made the first half of the book tough going, with a boring plot and very unsympathetic characters. However, the last third of the book has a very different feel - when the mission flirts with disaster, the plot takes off, and most of the characters develop another much-needed dimension. It was worth reading for this part of the book alone.

It is a far inferior book to others about Mars, for instance Kim Stanley Robinson's 'Red Mars', or Andy Weir's 'The Martian'. But it is probably still worth a read if you want to see the way a mission to Mars might look like - at least from a 1990s perspective.

2 out of 5.

(An old version of this was accidentally published earlier. Apologies. I shall go and sit in a corner for five minutes and mutter 'don't press the publish button until you're ready'.)

Thursday, 10 January 2019

Book review: "The Planet Factory", by Elizabeth Tasker

It is unusual for a popular science book to start by saying that what you are reading will probably be proved wrong in a very short period. Yet that is exactly what astrophysicist Elizabeth Tasker states in this excellent book about how planets and moons form.

There is a good reason for this: twenty-five years ago we did not know of any planets outside our solar system, and some people claimed that our planetary system might be unique. All our models on how planets formed had to be based on what we could see in our own system. Yet by mid-2018 we knew of 3,700 planetary systems, and virtually every one has posed more questions than it has answered. Together, they have caused us to question our assumptions on how all planets - including the Earth - formed.

Ms Tasker details how primordial clouds of dust and gas collapses to form full solar systems with stars and planets, and how much we still have to learn about this most fundamental of processes.

She examines the weird planets that may exist: such as ones that orbit within their star, ones with seas of tar, or ones made of lava or others where it rains diamonds. Truly alien worlds that belong in science fiction - and indeed, science fiction worlds may not be as fictional as we once thought. Want a planet with two suns, such as Star Wars' Tatoooine? They exist. Want an ice world? Take your pick.

The reason many people are interested in planets is the possibility they may harbour life. In reality this is the only time when the media pays attention to the discovery of a new planet, usually with headlines such as "Most Earth-like planet could harbour life." Ms Tasker dives behind the headlines and looks at why they are often misleading, and how life might occur on planets that might be very different from the Earth. Finally, she examines how in the future we might be able to detect life on a distant planet, if not the form of the life, even from tremendous distances.

Planetary formation can be a very dry subject, and Ms Tasker does a good job in explaining the terminology in a light and accessible manner. Even so, this is not a children's book, and in places will require a little perseverance to understand the concepts, and some thumbing back through the pages to find definitions. But the perseverance certainly pays off.

The biggest issue I found with this book is how the uncertainty of how things happen and the resultant speculation can make things confusing as temporary theories conflict. An enhancement of the glossary at the end of the book for commonly-used terms would also be helpful.

If you have any interest in how the Earth formed, or in whether there is life elsewhere in the universe, then this book in an invaluable primer.

4 out of 5.

Wednesday, 9 January 2019

Scarpa Trek boots

I have used Scarpa boots as my main walking boots for well over fifteen years. I have probably worn a dozen pairs, and they have given sterling service. I can put on a new pair and walk for twenty miles with scarcely any breaking in.

Buying any new shoes can be problematic for me. I have metal in my ankle, which means that many shoes and boots cripple me within a few miles, if not steps. Our understairs cupboard contains three or four pairs of trainers which seemed fine in the shop and for the first few days, but once broken in caused me crippling pain as the fabric breaks in and pushes against the metal. This always seems to happen after they're too worn to take back for a refund. Yet the fit of Scarpa Trek boots have always worked for me out of the box.

Over those years Scarpa have changed the design: My first pair were vanilla Trek boots, which I think then became Trek 2, then Trek GTX. Each model had changes, some fairly large (for instance the removal of the protection on the toe box that I always quite liked). But throughout these changes, I found they boots just worked for me, more or less out of the box - I assume that they've always used the same last so the overall shape remains the same despite detail differences.

This means that once I am sure a pair fits me, I purchase three or four pairs, much to the amusement of the staff in the shop!

I am not complaining about Scarpa changing the design, nor do I expect them to keep the design static for a couple of decades just to help people like myself. In fact, it's great that there are boots that work so well for me.

If I have one complaint, it is that the upper eventually fails behind the toe box, where creases form with use. These eventually cracks and leak well before the soles wear out. I also need a pair of Sorbothane insoles, instead of the thin insoles that come with the boots. However since I get well over a thousand miles out of each pair of boots, sometimes with minimal maintenance and cleaning, these are very minor criticisms.

I last bought three pairs of boots seven or eight years ago, and my last pair are getting a little worn. I have looked online to order a new pair, and it looks as though they have been redesigned again - they're still called Trek GTX, but from the pictures it appear there are detail differences.

Hopefully they will be fine. At £170 a pair, it is going to be an interesting test!

Tuesday, 8 January 2019

Exploring versus adventuring.

I had a quick look on t'Internet to see how many self-styled explorers were currently on their travels.

There are an awful lot of them.

I do not want to denigrate their achievements; indeed, I am full of admiration for what they are doing, and wish I had the money / time / physicality / insanity to do it myself. But few are really exploring, because they are all travelling where people have been before and know well.

There are only two areas on Earth that still remain to be explored, where we can have a 'wow!' feeling that Admunsen or Scott must have felt, of being somewhere that no human has seen before. They are the polar regions and the deep sea.

Someone hoping to climb Everest one stated that he is an explorer. In my view he is not. 3,500 people have climbed the mountain, a number that will continue to increase. Even if you decide to do it wearing a dress, or waking backwards without oxygen, or up the East Face, or hang-glide part of the way up and cook a five-course meal ever 500 feet - you are not exploring. The high risk of the activity does not make it exploration.

It is adventuring.

I think I prefer adventuring to exploring anyway. Adventuring is something we can all do - whether it is pushing our limits by running a marathon, or by going sky-diving, or by taking holidays off the tourist map. Adventuring involves risk, but that risk can be manages to suit your personal level.

So this weekend, try to go adventuring. Push your limits; live your life.

Just don't call it exploring.

Monday, 7 January 2019

Suburban wildlife

I did a walk on Saturday. During it, I saw two foxes (one of which seemed as large as a large dog), a herd of wild deer (one with massive antlers), and loads of squirrels, ducks, geese etc. All were fairly unflustered by my presence - the deer allowed me to get within about thirty metres of them before they ambled into the trees.

I wouldn't mention this, except the entire walk was well within the borders of the M25. London can be surprisingly rural.

I'm afraid these are not the best photos, and have been heavily cropped, but at least show I'm not suffering from some strange form of walker's madness ...
An urban fox.

Geese and swans on a lake in Hainault Country Park. 
A suburban deer.

Whatch'ya looking at ?

Sunday, 6 January 2019

Storage licence champion

Whilst waiting for a tube train early on New Years Day, I read the following notice (for reading notices is about all there is to do on Bank Station at 07.00 on New Years Day).

If that seems fairly uninteresting, then you are normal. It is an application to store some unspecified material bagged, secured and caged in a five square metre space. The material that is required by a project to upgrade the station.

It is interesting to wonder who this notice is intended for: the vast majority of commuters would be uninterested in it, and I suppose it is for anyone wanting to use the particular storage area for any other purpose.

However I was drawn to the bottom-left of the notice, which shows there is something called a "Storage Licence Champion".

At first, this seemed like a non-job the likes of Private Eye and certain papers love to make fun of. The word 'champion' makes it sound like a total non-job, a person who goes around proselytising the benefits of a good storage licence.

On reflection though, that's harsh, and it could well be a valuable role.

Firstly, tube stations (especially underground ones) are cramped affairs, and space is at a premium.

Secondly, people need to know where things are.

Thirdly, you do not want passengers interfering with such things.

Fourthly, there is a massive safety aspect. In 2007 a tube train derailed at Mile End station when it struck a roll of fire-resistant blanket that had been left nearby, and which had been moved onto the track by the draught of a passing train. A causal factor in the report is:
 "the incomplete training and supporting documentation provided to Site Persons in Charge (SPCs) in relation to the storage of materials in cross passages."
Table 1 in the accident report outlines other cases where improperly-stored items had hit trains.

So there probably is a good need for such a role - if it is as I assume. I do query the job title, however. It should be: "Person who ensures everything is put away where it should be so we don't get any fuck-ups."

On second thoughts, "Storage Licence Champion" is probably better ...

Saturday, 5 January 2019

Another sign-eating tree

Following on from my earlier post about metal-eating trees.

This cooperative attempt by two trees to consume a perfectly innocent sign was observed near Boston Spa on the Ebor Way.

It seems trees don't like private fishing.

Friday, 4 January 2019

My favourite trails

I am often asked: "what is your favourite trail?"

It's an interesting question, not the least because it is a very subjective one: I like moorland and love squelching through boggy ground, whilst the undoubted wonders of the Lake District leaves me a little cold. I'm often as happy strolling around a city as I am wandering though a remote area. Other people would doubtless differ. The time of year that a trail is walked, or the weather on an individual day, can also make a large difference.

I have only done a few trails - I have  not even completed all the National Trails (with the Pennine Bridleway, Southern Upland Way and Yorkshire Wolds Way left to do), and there are thousands of minor trails that are left to be done.

Having said all that, what are my favourite, and least favourite, trails?

National Trails:


The Thames Path
Okay, this might seem like an odd one. A trail that goes through the heart of the capital city, following a river and with barely any hills to be climbed, would be few walkers' choice. Yet the Thames Path is glorious. True, there are no hills, but views unveil themselves around every turn. It is also an intensely varied path, with fields near the source, through a series of wonderful riverside towns, to the urban glories of London. It is a trail I would happily do again many times.

An honourable mention goes to the Pembrokeshire Coastal Path, which is a little gem.

Least favourite:

The Speyside Way.
This is another slightly odd one. With the exception of a coastal section, it is another river walk, but the contrasts with the Thames Path are extreme. In particular, there is a hateful section with nasty stiles every few metres that proved hideous to negotiate with a large rucksack. The trail also has several branches that make it difficult to walk in one continuous outing.

Other trails:


The Limestone Way.
This was a very difficult choice to make, as there are so many beautiful and interesting trails, not all well-regarded. But as a Derbyshire man born and bred, a trail that cuts to and fro across the White Peak has to be at number one. The Limestone Way is an accessible trail, is easy to split into two two-day walks by stopping at Matlock, and gives you glimpses of some superlative White Peak scenery. And the final stretch to Cave Dale and down into Castleton is a joy.

Least favourite.

Several trails I have completed have left me underwhelmed. But all have had something positive to say for them, and as they are generally shorter it is easier to forgive transgressions.

So I shall take the coward's way out and not nominate an entire trail. Instead I shall mention one short stretch of the Teesdale Way from Middlesborough towards the coast, which is a long and far from glamorous trudge between steelworks and chemical plants.

Thursday, 3 January 2019

The SS May

I've recently been thinking of Mrs May as being the SS Ohio.

For anyone not acquainted with the real story, it's well worth a read:

I'm not claiming that Mrs May weighs a few thousand tonnes; only that she resembles the ship in her sheer doggedness in not sinking against all comers.
"Although May reached Brexit successfully, she was so badly damaged that she had to be effectively scuttled in order to offload her duties, and never led again. The PM is fondly remembered in Britain, where to this day she is considered to be the saviour of the beleaguered island."
"Another blimp, this time a Rees-Mogg 1725, was shot down by a May gunner; however, the blimp crashed into May's starboard side, forward of the cabinet table, and exploded. A rain of shite showered the government from stem to stern. The blimp's bomb failed to detonate. Captain Clarke was telephoned from aft by the chief officer, who told Clarke that the Rees-Mogg 1725 had crashed into the media and then bounced onto the government. Clarke 'rather curtly' replied: "Oh that's nothing. We've had a Boris 2018 on the foredeck for nearly half an hour.""
"Wires were now hauled aboard and emergency salvage trolls began to discharge the memes. At the same time, a fleet auxiliary, RFA Hammond Organ, began to pump 10,000 tons of votes into his own ballot boxes. As the votes flowed in, May sank lower and lower in the water. The last few votes entered her as simultaneously her keel settled on the bottom. Her captain, the British public, was subsequently awarded the George Cross."
"On 19 September 2019 the forward half of May was towed ten miles offshore and sunk by gunfire from the destroyer HMS Johnson. On 3 October, the stern half was scuttled in deep water using explosive charges laid by the salvage vessel RFA Mogg's Nanny."
It is interesting to think of what other famous ships politicians might be. Is Cable an S-80 submarine, poorly designed, unfit for purpose before it's even left the dock? Was David Cameron the Titanic, a vainglorious vessel that sunk the country on its own self-regard? And as for Jeremy Corbyn ... well, I'll let you decide which ship would best represent Jeremy Corbyn ...

Wednesday, 2 January 2019

A 'modernised' modern major-general song.

I am the very model of a Brexiteer Armchair-General,

I've more ignorant than vegetable, animal, or mineral,

I love the kings of England, and I fight the fights historical

From Amsterdam to Maastricht, in order categorical;

I'm ill acquainted, too, with matters mathematical,

For me all votes of confidence are problematical,

About the evils of Europe I'm teeming with a lot o' news,

With many dismal facts about those awful remainers' views.

With apologies to Gilbert and Sullivan.

Tuesday, 1 January 2019

Twenty years

Twenty years ago today, I did my first walk. It was a short one, from the Cat and Fiddle pub in the Peak District, over to Cheshire's highest point on Shining Tor, along the ridge past Cats Tor and then back via a valley.

The last operation on my ankle had been six months before, and I had a vague idea to do the Pennine Way before the anniversary of that operation. In the end I missed the target by three or four months, but that simple stroll along the Derbyshire / Cheshire border started an obsession that has never quite faded.

In those twenty years, I have completed 1,029 walks for my website, during which I walked a total of 18,124 miles. I have ascended or descended 1.5 million feet (290 miles), written a million words of notes for the website, and not many fewer for directions. I have taken many photos, of which 83,435 are ready for use on this site.

In that time I have gained a wife (who is for some odd reason still with me), and a son. Where I was renting, we now own a house that makes me feel rather disreputably middle class. My hair is greyer (and longer), my stomach larger, and my bones and muscles moan and ache where once they were silent. I have met many people, from trailmates to people who are now firm friends. And some who have sadly faded into the mist.

There are still so many places I have not been, and the map of my walks remains blank in too many areas. My yearning - my desire - to walk has not dissipated.

I may not achieve another 1,000 walks in the next twenty years - indeed, with a young son to look after it is highly unlikely - but I do hope to continue seeing the best (and sometimes worst) of what our wonderful country has to offer.

Perhaps I might see you out there. If so, please say hello.

Memories forever dear, holidays of yesteryear.

Walk totals

Total mileage18,124.4 miles
Total ascent1,531,311 feet (290.02 miles)
Total descent1,532,388 feet (290.22 miles)
Total words in notes1,159,158 words
Total words in directions787,935 words

Walk records

Longest walk#91631.5 milesBrandon StationWymondham station
Shortest walk#112.9 milesStanton Moor car parkStanton Moor car park
Most ascent#2396700 feetCayton BayFlamborough North Landing
Least ascent#153 feetWaterbeachWaterbeach
Most descent#2396758 feetCayton BayFlamborough North Landing
Least descent#153 feetWaterbeachWaterbeach

The obligatory map

And here is a rather poor quality map of all my walks. There are far too many large blank areas...